Sunday, April 5, 2009

Doctor update and random hospital musings...

The doctor this morning seemed hopeful with the current state of things. I was given the second steroid shot at 3 am (not a nice way to be woken up, but it was for a good cause). The nurse was very kind and didn't hook me up to the monitors at that point because she knew that I had only slept an hour the previous 24 hours and my body was finally allowing me some much needed rest. At 5 am the monitors were hooked back up and my crazy babies were nice and calm which made for a much shorter monitoring experience. Both babies were doing well and the contractions were considerably slowed. All very good news.

At 10:00 the doctor came in and informed me that I needed to spend another day in the hospital since the second steroid shot isn't effective until after it's administered so they want to watch me until then. The good news is if I keep responding well to the meds. I get to go home tomorrow and continue the meds. at home. The bad news is I'll be on bed rest for the rest of the pregnancy (Which I hope is for many more weeks for the babies). Although I was anticipating some bed rest due to my cervix at some point I really didn't expect all of this. Even friday night I was so confident that the fFN would be negative, and I think some of the reality of all of this is just now starting to hit me. I'm frustrated and worried and a little guilty. I keep going over things in my mind wondering if I could have done something different. Marcus is very sweet though and refused to allow me to think about my own culpability in this. I know realistically that it probably wasn't anything I did or didn't do, I've been diligent in listening to the instructions of my doctors but still I wonder...

Of course the practical side of me is also looking at my calendar at all of the things I need to rearrange in my life. My classes, school work, tests, meetings, assignments, internships both this year and next years, people I need to inform that I'll be captive in my apartment for awhile, wondering about the next few weeks and what it's all going to look like, and above all else praying that the babies stay put for many more weeks.

That's all we know at this point. At the last monitoring at 1:00 the babies were good and I only had a few contractions which I still can't feel so that's good.

Now that I'm done with the medical stuff I just want to record some of the more awkward experiences of my hospital stay.

First I was desperate for a shower. I felt so gross after lying around for a day and was so hoping that I would be allowed to take one. I was elated when I was granted permission but didn't realize the complexities that this shower would entail. Since I'm still hooked up to an IV, the put a latex medical glove over it and then taped the end. I was then given the instructions not to get my left hand wet, and to shower with that arm facing out. Okay... I'll do my best maneuvering in the shower, not getting wet, and pulling the IV carrier thing with me.

Showering with one hand is difficult enough but this was further complicated by the fact that you have to hand hold the water faucet. It's not a regular shower head that you stand under, so this then left me with zero hands, so I was unsure about how to go about actually washing myself. It was an awkward combination of using the water faucet, hanging it up and then trying to wash one handed. Had I know that it would be this impossible I wouldn't have let Marcus go to work until after the shower was over. I did feel a little better afterwards but how clean I actually am is probably up for debate.

The second awkward experience was this afternoon when the PCA (not sure what this stands for) came in to take my stats. When she saw me she said, "You look like your tan." (At least that's what I thought she said). So a little confused I said, "oh. Well I really don't think that I am," Because that's the truth I'm really not tan.

Seeing the confused look on her face at that response it then occurred to me that she had expressed that she thought I looked like I was 10, not tan. Opps... but just for the record I look neither 10 nor tan. I get that I look younger than I am a lot, but not 10.

Here's a not so cute pic. from today. The steroid shots cause me to retain water and I already think my face looks fatter. Oh, well, and I look a little bald but again oh well my hair was wet and out of the way (but you'll notice in the pic my lack of tan haha).

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