Thoughts on having twins...

This is going to sound strange but when I watch Eli and Emerson interact with one another, when I see them laugh at the jokes only the two of them understand, tackle each other, create games with rules created only for each other, worry with the other is hurt or sick; I wonder if kids who aren't part of a set are lonely.

I know this is crazy talk. I don't have a twin and I was fine, but Eli and Emerson are so interconnected that I just can't imagine one without the other.

Their relationship fascinates me.

Tonight they were playing each other. Talking and laughing in a way that I can't discern or understand but they both clearly know what's going on.

At exactly the same moment they ran into the living and with matching smiles told me their baby was taking a bath. Parents of toddlers probably relate, when I say I did not greet this news with excitement. I envisioned a mess of some sort who knows what they were bathing their baby in (maple syrup perhaps), but when I asked them to show me they happily took me to the darkened bathroom and showed me that their baby was indeed taking a bath in the empty bathtub. (Huge sigh of relief, and the toilet paper hadn't been touched and no other mess, double sigh of relief).

Then the baby went potty, weighed herself, and washed her hands.

Then off they went for the rest of the bedtime routine and I returned to the living room. They were chatting and playing and then they once again eagerly found me in the living room to inform that now the baby was night night.

I went into their room to see that they had piled every blanket and sheet they could find on top of the cradle. A mountain of blankest covered the doll and they were so pleased with themselves. They even switched off the light (by climbing on a chair) and then whispered "shhh" because the baby was sleeping.

They did an entire nighttime routine with their baby in sync with one another. Each knowing exactly what came next.

I know this is a rambling mess, but it's hard for me to describe how grateful I am that they have each other.

I never wished for twins, in fact I wish against having twins. Which sounds horrible I know, but I knew the risks and more than anything I wanted a shot a normal, uneventful, pregnancy. Plus I was a full time grad-student and figured I could put one baby in a sling and go to class if needed. Two babies presented a logistical problem to these idealistic plans.

In the end my fears were realized and I didn't get the normal, uneventful pregnancy, or the birth I wanted. There was no bringing one baby to class in a sling and every logistical problem I imagined was realized. However, despite all this I did get two really amazing kids who are connected in ways that amaze and astound me every day.

I hope they will always share such a deep bond with one another, laughing at jokes I don't understand, teasing each other, creating games, and worrying when the other is upset.

It's not at all what I planned, but I can't imagine it any other way.