the conversations where people start saying ignorant hurtful things (even though they don't know or realize they're saying stupid hurtful things).
My brother and his wife were over this evening and somehow we got on the conversations about babies. I think because we have several cousins who are pregnant. My brother mentioned that he really wanted a son someday to carry on the family name, and I don't even know how it came up but talk about genetics became involved.
My brother was adamant that is was important that our family name not only be carried on but that it be carried on with his genetics.
I tried making points about people who were infertile, couples who adopt, same-sex couples where both partners can't contribute, and the name can still be carried on even without a genetic element, but he kept going and going... and I eventually just stopped talking and let my brother say his piece.
I could tell it bothered Marcus. I know my brother doesn't know about our IF and how Eli and Emerson came to be, but these kinds of comments hurt. I know we can't fully fault my brother for his comments because he wasn't intentionally trying to hurt us. (Although they were just kind of stupid comments in general). He has no way of knowing at this point that he was speaking about something that directly affects us.
After they left Marcus mentioned that we should have just told them. (Which I was tempted to do but I won't do until talking with Marcus). I suppose someday that conversation will have to happen.
:::
On a totally different note the reason my brother was over was to help Marcus get my massive bookshelf (it's 7ft tall 5ft wide) into my office at work since we don't have a truck.
My sister-in-law stayed at our house while the babies slept, and Marcus, my brother, and I went down to my church. I have been shown how to disarm and arm the alarm once and I was hoping I could remember how.
Yeah... turns out I didn't remember and I set the alarm off. It was loud and obnoxious and even though I called the company for assistance and asked them not to dispatch anyone, a guy from the church came down anyways.
At first when he came in he only saw Marcus and my brother and he was mad. When I came around the corner he was a little less irritated but I don't think he was very pleased about being called down for nothing. I was told the other day that accidently setting off the alarm is a $75 fee. I hope they take pity on me since this was my first attempt at using it.
1 comment:
I hate those conversations too, because I just want to scream at the person. Probably why I just avoid my brother, because any conversation we have is along those lines.
Interestingly enough...our contractor last week was talking about his daughter who he has nothing to do with...and how she told him he's nothing but a sperm donor to her. That stung. Even though this guy has no idea about our background it stung to hear someone use that in such a negative way.
Oops about the alarm. I'd like to think they'd give you a pass for that booboo.
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